Awareness, Living and Yoga


Nothing stays the same. Lack of change is stagnant. A yoga practice is no exception to this law of life. The student new to the mat practices to learn how to breathe, do basic poses and overcome fear of standing out as a novice. Once confidence and familiarity with moves settles in the mind, the yogi ventures forward with new moves and extends old edges in classic moves. Then, they become a neo-classic version. Courage expands. An inquisitive thought and emotion process stirs. It starts physically; however, expansion of feelings can actually be scarier than any pose you try. It is more comfortable to keep walking on the familiar and generally followed path. But, you feel the pull of the unfamiliar and you can't help but step in this discovered refuge. The instinctive, logical, and heart driven forces work to keep you in place.

As the practice deepens, so does the relationship the yogi has with him/herself...and others. The moment of transition is not realized as it happens. You just suddenly become aware of a change. Aware of something beyond you and your world. It is elusive. You try to trace it back in time; but, you don't get far because it actually doesn't matter. It just is. You not only have stretched your muscles, you have stretched your awareness beyond conscious thought. Your inner self becomes a magnet...drawing what strengthens it closer. Was it the unconscious finding a way to slip out of its dark side of the mind? Is it the Yin and Yang coiling themselves tighter?

You can set intentions on a physical practice, goals or dreams to experience in life; however, until awareness beyond what you can read, hear or see cracks open...you realize you've only scratched the surface of living. Then, the real practice begins. Everything gets analyzed.

Awareness of your unlimited potential, other's potential, the significance of small details, changes and exchanges of energies, a fierce desire to rise above sameness. Not simply potential of achievements. Rather, the potential of passion in all you do, are, and share it with. You have the epiphany of what a part of evolution entails...but, just a part. You want, need to know more. You simultaneously become the active participant and observer of your personal evolution. It is daunting, disconcerting, enticing, addictive, downright intoxicating. You don't know what to expect next...so you keep balancing on the tightrope you've stepped on...pause when unstable, yet move forward when no longer able to stand still.

How can doing Sun Salutations, Warrior poses and backbends make this happen? Can it just be the poses and the focused breathing? Doubt it. Is it the improved sense of well-being by taking time for yourself? Don't think so. Are there clear answers in the millions of books out there? Pieces of clarification, but, not your entire answer. Can it be the collective energy shared with others during a practice? Might play a role. Is this what it means to grow up? If so, time can't be attached to growth...some never grow up...and some have intuitive wisdom beyond their years.

You start to have more questions than answers. So, you keep practicing, discovering, fine tuning poses, refining your approach and re-defining your intentions...letting go of intentions. Become patient with the answers you seek. As your practice and sense of awareness evolves...the answers will detach from the questions...until the next one rises to the surface...and the walk on the tightrope of living and loving with awareness beyond belief continues.
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